Dear Jackson,

My little brother, what can I say?

I can say, that I always, always wanted a brother or sister as long as I can remember.
When I found out we were expecting you, I was so happy that I would finally have my wish.

When I found out you were not well, I hoped you would still join us, because even if you were sick I would have loved you just as much, the way I loved my beautiful cousin Timothy.

It saddens me that I won’t get to meet you, or teach you all the things I had planned on teaching you. I wanted to teach you silly games and show you all the children’s books I’ve been collecting over the years.

I was hoping to teach you some Japanese and see if you would learn to sing with mum and I.

Before I knew if you were a boy or a girl, I knew Rik would spoil you the way he’s always spoilt me and I had to lecture him not to give you lollies while your baby teeth were growing. Whether you had been a boy or a girl, Rik would have had you on the sideline at Rugby and probably would have taught you how to make a pie sandwich.

Your mother, well she would have shown you that you can do anything and be anyone and made you feel so beautiful that no matter what life dealt you, you’d still have your sense of self…well that’s what she gave me.

You know you have really great parents Jackson, parents who have struggled long and hard to become the loving couple who would have looked after you and given you every opportunity in life. I know that even though you are not with us now, you have changed us all and given us yet another reason to be close to one another.

I believe that is your gift to us, so thank you little brother, I will treasure the thought of you always.

Love your big sister

Miri.